Posts Tagged ‘Shishi’

Oh Shi-Shi, They Got Drive-Thru Apple Stores Now?: Thieves Crash BMW Through Apple Store In Robbery


This is the security camera footage from an Apple store in Temecula, California where last week a group of dumbasses drove their BMW SUV through the window and security gate and stole a bunch of iPads and computers. Unfortunately for the idiots involved, their license plate got stuck in the security gate on the way out and they were easily located and arrested. A couple things, 1. were you not worried about security cameras catching your license plate either? 2. WHY DID YOU USE YOUR OWN CAR? Based on the video it looks like it probably took a decent amount of cosmetic damage. Were you stealing iPads to pay for the damage you did to your car during the robbery? Regardless, enjoy the crappy ham and cheese sandwiches and cranberry juice boxes, @$ $ holes (I’ve been to jail in Temecula before).

Hit the jump for the video which may or may yes look like they’re actually trying to destroy as many products as possible by breaking all the tables.

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Holy Shi-Shi: THIS — This Is Why You Wear Suncreen


Seen here looking suspiciously like Gandalf (cast a healing spell on that shit, bro!), a 69-year old trucker who’s had the left side of his face exposed to the sun for 28 years (from the driver’s side window) shows off the notable difference in skin texture from the right, normally shaded side. That…wow. I would have maybe looked into driving a British truck every-other haul.

His condition is called unilateral dermatoheliosis, from the Greek dermis and helios, skin and sun. It’s also called photoaging, and it results from chronic exposure to the sun’s UVA and UVB rays. In his case, it only affected the left side of his face because of his work. As he drove, he received much many hours of sunlight through the left window of his vehicle.

Now I know what you’re thinking, “Big deal — I spend all day indoors staring at a computer or television screen, there’s no way that’s ever gonna happen to me.” And you know what? You’re right. Sad, but right. I dunno, go hit the beach or something, shit! “Sharks.” Right again! Scoot over and make some room for me on the couch.

Thanks to bb, who is beautifully fair-skinned and has to be very careful in the sun. Me? I’m reckless in the sun! *runs across street blindfolded*

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Oh Shishi — You Got Them Boom Boom Pows?: Instant Party Vest With Integrated 8-Inch Subwoofer


This is a vest with an integrated 8-inch subwoofer. You know, because carrying a boombox around on your shoulder apparently isn’t cool enough anymore. *rambles on about the good old days until you get bored and leave so I can finally strip down to the flesh and drink in peace and quiet*

You just found a one of a kind mobile party. All you need to do is charge the batteries and plug in your mp3 player. The main sound comes from a set of two amplified motorcycle speakers just off your shoulders. The bass comes from a low-profile amplified 8″ subwoofer. The power comes from a custom 10 cell rechargeable battery belt, size 36. You will easily be the loudest person in the room. The vest comes with a battery charger for the belt and a wire to connect your tunes to the vest. You have independent volume and subwoofer controls on your hip.

Captain CANYOUHEARMENOW? is actually selling the thing on Etsy, but unfortunately for you wanna-be life-of-the-party types, it costs $ 850. That makes it far more economical to just get drunk and make an ass out of yourself. Just sayin’, you know how many times I’ve been the life of the party? Every single one. “You just get drunk and set things on fire.” Whoa whoa whoa — WTF homey?! Don’t go giving away my secrets. Not coo, bro, not coo at all.

Hit the jump for a shot of the front and some others of the system at rest.

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