Posts Tagged ‘Beers’
WTF, Guys? Invite Me Next Time: Family Of Bears Break Into Norgwegian Cabin, Chug 100 Beers, Trash The Place
Picture unrelated: he actually bought that beer.
Because even bears know how to party harder than most of my friends (thanks for the birthday party, jerks!), a family of black bears recently TORE THE WALL OFF A CABIN to gain access, chugged over 100 beers and ate all the food inside, then shat and pissed everywhere. No word if they thought that was the cabin where Goldilocks lived, but bears are notoriously poor with addresses.
“They had a hell of a party in there,” cabin owner Even Borthen Nilsen told NRK. “The cabin has the stench of a right old piss up, trash, and bears.”
The bear, and three cubs, are reported to have forced their way into the cabin by ripping a wall off.
“The entire cabin was destroyed,” Nilsen told the local Finnmarken.no daily.
“The beds and all kitchen appliances, stove, oven and cupboards and shelves were all smashed to pieces,” he said.
And furthermore the bears had finished off all the food and drink in the house – including all the marshmallows, chocolate spread, honey and over 100 cans of beer.
Nilsen explained that excrement on the outside of the cabin left him in no doubt that it was a family of bears which had taken over his cabin for night of feasting and drunken revelry.
“You can see footprints on the windows,” he said.
Did you read that? Footprints on the windows. My God that must’ve been one hell of a party. Bears getting so drunk they can f***ing walk on walls? I’m *this close* to moving into the woods and starting a new life.
Thanks to LupusYonderboy, who’s actually partied with bears before and says they’re pretty cool as long you don’t go for a high-five and they accidentally miss and maul your face off.
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This is a set of three beer situations (well, six-packs) created for Miller Genuine Draft in Turkey that, when integrated like a Transformer, form a boombox. Granted it’s nonfunctional, however that cares, you’ve got 18 shitty beers to chug. \* pounds ten, attempts readjusting volume knob on box \* Hey– HEY– who broke the boombox? “That’s a cardboard beer situation.” Sooooooo … use it as a helmet and pretend I’m an astronaut? “Please don’t.” MOON BASE TO MARS, COME IN MARS.
Hit the jump for some closeups of
a peenor the boxes.
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Two beers to clever, 40-ounces to freedom.
According to a recent study performed at the University of Illinois, Chicago, drinking around two beers makes you cleverer and more adept at thinking outside the box. *eye-roll* Shocking news, really. I’ve neeeever come up with anything clever that didn’t involve a couple beers. “You’ve never come up with anything clever, period.” So true, so true.
The team found that test subjects with a BAC of .07 (just under legally drink in most states) struggled with attention-intensive trials but excelled at questions that required more flexible thinking. The study found that the drunks not only solved 40 percent more questions than their sober control group, they did so three and a half seconds faster as well–completing their tests in 12 seconds compared to 15.5 for the sobers.
So yeah, drinking two beers makes you cleverer. Twelve beers? Drinking twelve beers makes you me. “What about twenty?” Drinking twenty beers makes me think you might have a problem.
Thanks to Liz, who tried to convince me three vodka cocktails makes her the funniest person on the planet.